small things...

Dairy makes a sneak attack

Yesterday a had a few friends over for a game of cards and some food.  (I’m a jerk and didn’t take any photos of any of it!)  The card playing was fun, but the food was amazing.  And there was a lot of cheese. I mean A LOT of cheese.  And I partook.  Even though just a few short days ago I said I wouldn’t.  Apparently my dairy addiction is more serious then I thought.  But it’d tricky when you’re tempted by the best cheese you’ve ever tasted.

Triple-freaking-creme.  Holy hell, it was good.  I wasn’t the only one going overboard with this cheese or trying to time the number of times I got up to get some more so that it wasn’t obscenely obvious that, yes, I was going to eat more cheese.  But not only cheese, there was also quiche.  Bacon, corn, and arugula quiche.  Amazing, cheesy and rich quiche. I put it all in my belly.

So I was feeling pretty good for most of the day.  Having fun and thinking… “Maybe dairy and I are cool…?”

Then about 30 minutes after everyone left dairy made a sneak attack.  stomach cramping an general sickness for the rest of the evening.

:(

I’m back to no dairy today and for the rest of the week.  I’m hoping that I can find  a way to include *some* dairy and cheese in my diet, but it looks like it’s going to have to be just a wee bit. 

Who needs the cows to come home?

On my way down to the beer fest on Sunday I received a message from my friend Simona.  She wanted to know if I’d be interested in going diary and processed food free for 7 days in a challenge with her.  She has recently become freaked out by the growing awareness of all that is done to food so that we can keep it on our shelves and in our pantries for a few months longer.  And the general creepiness that is the dairy industry.

I’ve been mulling over my own issues with dairy lately…which has gone something like this, “Dairy makes me sick. I LOVE CHEESE.  Sometimes I feel hungover after eating dairy. FEED ME ICE CREAM.” and so on.

And so even though when that guru-lady told me that dairy was the devil I rolled my eyes…I figure I’m due for a bit of a break from the dairy monkey on my back.  I’m not so good with the all-or-nothing attitude.  Usually when I tell myself I can’t eat something it will become all that I want to eat.  But 7 days is not such a big deal. 

 

I think the no-processed foods part will be a piece of cake (haha.no.not literally) b/c I already cook most of my meals at home.  but we’ll see!

love and happy cows

Erin

Drinking alone in the street

I headed down to Oak Park a little after 3pm Saturday afternoon.  It was getting sweaty out, but there were still tons of people out along the lakefront and driving down Lake Shore Drive.  It took me about an hour to make it there, but I found parking right away and headed into this little party

I went to this festival by myself because 1) I decided last minute enough that many people already had plans or couldn’t get babysitters and 2) I’ve decided that even if I have to go by myself I don’t want to miss out on fun times just because no one can join me.  And as experience has shown – sometimes the unexpected can happen when push yourself out of your comfort zone.

I’ll admit it felt a little strange knowing that I was going to have a drink or two alone alone among the masses, but I brought my camera to add a little purpose to the day!

Beer #1 (please notice commemorative little beer glass)

The “Eugene” was a porter from local beer superstars: Revolution Brewery.  This beer was delicious – much lighter in taste then you might imagine while still being very flavorful.

I wandered around the fest drinking my beer and quickly realized it was packed with hipsters and just packed in general.  There was nowhere for a single girl to have a seat and sip her beer.  So I snuck back to behind the beer stands, where there was room to breathe, people watch and move around.

Just as I began the last few sips of my first beer I saw this tent!:

And drank this beer in honor of my nephew Emmett

Also a local brewer/tavern, Emmett’s had just 3 beers on tap.  The guy behind me in line convinced me to try the beer above that was described as “pre-prohibition”.  now I know why the prohibition grew so widespread – this beer sucked.  It tasted like buttered-popcorn jellybeans – wha??? yes, it’s true.  But still, I drank it. I was committed to the cause, yo.

It was just about this time that I started to think, “well I can’t really stay here all afternoon drinking by myself, now can I?” when I ran into these old friends

Keith and Rebecca were my old neighbors from that weird treehouse apartment I used to live in and had also made the trip down from Evanston to drink beers in the street.  They were smarter though and took the train.  I hung out with them for maybe another hour had one more beer and all of Keith’s water bottle before I decided to call it a fest and drive home.

So what did I discover attending a microbrew beer fest alone?  You are never alone at a beer fest.

Down the hatch!

xo

Erin

A good day

Today started off with one of these

• 1 cup almond milk
• 1 banana
• 1 small apple
• 1 tbsp peanut butter
• 1 tbsp flax meal
• 1 handful lettuce
• 1 small handful blueberries
• ice cubes
• small handful of homemade granola

Then I headed off to find this

Where I considered buying this

But instead picked up these

 

Next stop? Brew fest!

more later…

Week 2: Eating beige

*not pictured: chips and salsa

The first thing I noticed when looking at these photos is the abundance of yellow and beige and the lack of green.  Notable exception my large lunch salad.  Notable inclusion, cheesy, cheesy burrito. And it looks like I really screwed up that egg, but it was delish on toast with a little horseradish mustard. slurp.

today more colors, less beige.

Week 2: Good Eats

So what does one eat when one is no longer dieting?

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Yeah, this has had me stumped for a few days.  The answer should be “ANYTHING!”, but when coming off of a lifetime of dieting “anything” is a bit more threatening then it is freeing. 

So can it be “ANYTHING – in moderation.”?  I think this is getting closer.  But then I get caught up in the details of what exactly constitutes “moderation”.  How much is too much or just enough?  I mean, like, specifically…

A while back I declared myself a Michael Pollanist.  And not just because I have a nerd-crush on him.  His eating advice is so simple “Eat food.  Not too much. Mostly plants” But is it too simple?

I think that key, no matter what way a person chooses to live their life, is to get to know yourself better.  Yes, emotionally and spiritually, but also physically.  What does your body want?  How does your body feel? What is your body trying to tell you?  I know that often times I outright ignore my body’s messages.  They can be blatant and loud and so obvious you might think I’m a bit dense for not heeding their warnings.  But sometimes I just don’t.  That’s a whole other thing to sort out.

So how do you create a week 2 transformation plan around what to eat when you’ve got all these questions? The only answer I can come up with is to stop asking questions  Just stop thinking so much about it.  Try to take a moment to listen in and then just eat.

My plan this week (beginning Thursday) is to take a photo of everything I eat and post it on here to give myself a good sense of what I’m eating.  (This is reminding me of the time in college when I took out all of my money from the bank, counted it and stared at it repeating, ‘this is all your money, Erin.  There isn’t any more. stop thinking there is always more in the bank. this is it.” 

I apparently am the sort that needs to see to believe.  So now I’ll try it with food.

See you tomorrow with the first bit of good eats!

love and reality checks

Erin

We wear our sunglasses at night

Proof that one pair of glasses does not look right on everybody

If you guessed that the lovely lady bottom center was the fabulous owner of said glasses…you win.

I *heart* these people.

xo

love and old friends,

erin

Unwelcomed intruders

I’m finding the process of visualizing my future life to be pretty enjoyable (and actually effective…who knew? The universe, I guess).  The hardest part is the constant attempt from old negative thoughts to overthrow the queen (me).  They are like a mold.   You don’t realize they are creeping and growing until there all over place ruining your once fresh bread. harrumph.

But now that I’m making all this conscious effort to think positively I see them coming and can fend them off chuck norris style with a karate chop to the neck.  But it makes sense to me now why the negative thoughts have been so overpowering in the past.  They are sneaky little bastards who kick you in the balls (metaphorically speaking of course, I am a lady.)  And then they punch you in the head to stun you while they taunt you with their cruel words.  For realsies.

But like I said, chuck norris…karate chop…to the neck. it seems to be working.

Week 1: Visualization (or Begin with the End in Mind)

What’s the fastest way to derail a transformation plan? Make a list of all your faults first.  Seriously, way to depress a girl.  Luckily, I am quick on my feet! I switched gears, put aside the list and started making a new list of all the things I liked about myself and all the things I wanted for myself.  I started feeling a little like I used to feel when I made my christmas gift list for santa, “ ohmigodomigod….what if I actually GET all these things!!?!”

So I decided that was the place to start.  How do you how to start when you don’t know where you are going?  And so “visualization” became the first step in my big plan.

For you “I read the Secret” people it’s setting your intentions.

For you “I’m religious/spiritual” people it’s called prayer.

I’m partial to Steven Covey’s “Beginning with the end in mind.” because I like how it sounds.

The plan goes like this:

1) Every night before I go to bed I will repeat a little phrase to myself about what it is I want to be happening…in the present tense.

Examples:  I am happy.  I am healthy.  My body is a lean, mean, fighting machine 

2) I then picture my life the way I want it to be.  Like a daydream I create the images and scenes that capture what it is I want. 

Hey is that ME?  In that bikini? running down the beach? Nice ass, future me.

3)Every morning before I get out of bed I repeat the ritual and then picture how I want my day to unfold

4)  Throughout the day I repeat my little mantra’s from the night before when ever it occurs to me do so.

 

And that’s it for this week.  That’s the whole focus.  I’m not worrying about that laundry list of other things that I want to change/fix/delete.  I am only thinking about what’s ahead and trying on that life for fit.  It feels pretty awesome so far.

It’s my party

 

I am inspired by what Caitlin has created over at Operation Beautiful  and am sending her many congratulations this week as her book drops.  She challenged fellow bloggers to write a post on body image and I’ve accepted that challenge…and believe me, it’s a challenge.

Lately I’ve been trying to adjust my head around food and health and life and love and shit.  I wrote about it here and here and also here.  It’s a headache.  About two years ago I first toyed with the idea of giving up on dieting altogether.  To love my body as it is and to eat foods that I adore.  Because I love food.  I celebrate food.  You might remember this little project.(coming again soon in August…or September)  Food is dope.  And for some of us, loving food, but feeling a little crazy in the presence of food can make that previous statement all to real (addict-style, yo)

During that time of giving up on dieting I had a hard time letting go of old negative thoughts about food, my body and a lack of trust that I could do right by either.  And my health suffered as a result.  I gained weight, I lost energy and I felt seriously grumpy.  I just let go of one demon without escorting the others out as well.  And I’m pretty sure that first one is still lurking around…living in my basement…using up all my hot water. jerk.

Recently I came into the possession of this book.  (you may have heard that everyone and their mama is reading this book) I’m not afraid to be a part of a trend.  It just speaks to the universality of this issue.  And at it’s core all it is about is helping you find your core – the place where nothing else matters besides how much you love yourself and feel connected to yourself, god, the universe, elvis…whatever.  Where another person’s rules don’t apply to your life.  I am reminded that life is what you make of it…for better or for worse. 

When your life stinks, thank yourself.  When your life rocks, thank yourself.

When I had that conversation with that would-be guru a couple weeks ago she had some “rules’ and that was part of my discontent.  Hers were about health and food and about life that don’t fit in with what I want for my life. And her basic message was that I may not find what I want in life w/o her rules.  Maybe that wasn’t her message…maybe that’s just what I heard.

Bottom line, I’ve been lingering too long waiting to be invited, perhaps into my better, more exciting life.  But, shit I’M THE HOST of this boring party, right?  I keep talking about this same message, I realize it’s true.  Sometimes you just need to repeat a message to yourself a few times before you truly take it in. 

So about a week ago I put together my own little life transformation plan.  Inspired by a multitude of sources, I collected a list of the areas in my life that need tweaking or encouragement and for the next 17 weeks I will be focusing on each one at a time. 

Week 1: Visualization (or as Steven Covey would say “Begin with the end in mind.”

Tomorrow I’ll write more on the plan for this week….

love and life changes,

Erin

ps – you are welcome to follow along – or join right in!  let me know if you do