small things...

Holiday weekend

Memorial Day weekend was a whirlwind of weather on both sides of Lake Michigan.  I spent my weekend on the other side of the lake.  I’ve written about Sawyer, Michigan many, many, many, many times over the years and suspect I will again.  Probably in July…a couple of times even. So get used to it. (judging by how often I write about it…you probably are used to it. thanks)

We were hoping for beach weather all weekend, but instead it was stormy and cool.  We still had a good time. For example…

There was a carnival

And a bon fire

(Don’t forget to notice somebody’s mohawk)

The best thing about the rain is what comes afterwards

And thankfully we were able to have one lovely day at the beach

The drive down Lake Shore Drive on Monday was as to be expected.  Slow and crowded. 

And then we drove by a scene much like this one, and understood what all the traffic was about

And now I’m back. And it’s officially *hot*.  And I am officially ready.

Alls well

What Sunday brought for me.

It’s not about the food

Every diet promises the magical food combination that will cure that little weight problem you’ve got going on. 

• Restrict your calories and you’ll lose weight
• Eat only vegan raw foods the weight will just fall off
• Eat mostly animal proteins and few carbs and watch your tummy shrink
• Eat an exact combination of proteins, carbs and fats and you’ll lose 10lbs in ten days
• You must eat 6 meals a day to keep your metabolism up!
• Don’t eat ANY snacks!
• Eat only when you are hungry
• You do know when you’re hungry, right?
• Eat your biggest meal in the morning
• Eat your biggest meal at noon
• Eat your biggest meal at dinner
• Eat as much as you like as long as it’s soup
• Eat according to your blood type
• Eat according to your body shape
• Eat organic, whole foods
• Eat pre-packaged and carefully measured frozen foods
• Why don’t you just stop eating?

How does anyone sort this out?

I rattled that list out from memory, and could have added a thousand more*.  These are the messages that have been screaming at me through diet books, diet blogs, fitness magazines, through conversations with friends and family also trying to lose a few pounds.  '

And it brings me back again to Geneen Roth and to Michael Pollan and to Jon Gabriel.  And the message that I hear whispering, always whispering in the back of my head is this

It’s not about the food.  It’s how you feel about yourself.  It’s what you feel you are worthy of.  It’s how you care for your body and mind and your spirit. The food will sort itself out.

So I’ve decided to enact a ban on all diet talk. All diet books or blogs or magazines are forbidden.  If it has to do with celebrating life, body, spirit, adventure, love, friendship, purpose – it’s in!  Anything having to do with shame, restriction, punishment or deprivation is OUT.

And let me be clear that even as I write this there is a irritating monkey-voice in the back of my head that keeps nudging,

But maybe you should still join weight watchers – just in case.  And sure, don’t diet – but don’t eat too many carbs either!  okay fine, but why don’t you try to lose 10lbs first and then ‘give up’ dieting

The process of giving up dieting and treating myself better has been a real struggle for me.  I first talked about it here over a year ago – and I’ve not yet been able to make the changes I hoped for then.  I’m embarrassed to admit that.  But it’s the truth.

And I can’t make this new commitment to change if I can’t admit that I have struggled to make this same commitment over and over and over again. I’m not going to say that something is different now with me.  Just like I’ve had this monkey all along I’ve also had quiet steady voice that I can only sometimes hear above the monkey.  And it is always saying

You know what to do. You are love. And you can kick this monkey’s ass.

I am making the same decision now that I made last year.  And that is to listen to the voice that loves me.  And to kick that monkey’s ass.

xo

Erin

ps – no acutal monkeys will be harmed with this new life – i love monkeys!

It’s this monkey I’m trying to shake:

 

*(In fact – if you have any more, add them to the comments section).

Lots and lots and lots of trailers…and also James Frey

I went to a movie Sunday afternoon.  It was a somewhat spontaneous decision made after a weekend long headache lifted, but the rain and wind did not.  I ended up seeing a documentary I hadn’t even heard of, but chose it because it fits a theme in my life.  Well, two themes really

1. The foods you choose change everything
2. I will watch anything that calls itself a documentary. 

Number #2 is not because I’m a pseudo-intellectual (even though I was once accused of referencing NPR in a story just so people would know I listened to NPR), but because I like true stories – understanding that ‘truth’ is way more subjective then people tend to believe.

An aside, I just finished watching the first 1/2 of the Oprah re-interview with James Frey. If you don’t recall, James Frey was publicly humiliated after it came to light that some parts of his book, A Million Little Pieces were embellished and/or fabricated all together.  Oprah originally reamed him on her show for ‘betraying’ the American people (gag).  I lost a lot of respect for her after the airing of that original show.  I’m hoping she is going to apologize to him now.  I loved hearing about the painting he commissioned from Ed Ruscha entitled “Public Stoning” in tribute to his Oprah experience

(source)

But back to my original reason for this blog post.  So I went to this movie called “Forks over Knives.”

It’s another in a long line of documentaries trying to get at the truth of the food industry, problems with big farming, trying to show the public how the foods we eat are impacting our health, longevity, the planet, all the while promoting local, sustainable, organic food choices.  FOK wasn’t as entertaining or provocative as this one

Or as angry-fying as this one:

And it wasn’t as good as my favorites by my girl Kris Carr or the one about a local hero Farmer John or Oscar nominee Morgan’s Spurlock’s breakthrough hit

But it was good nonetheless.  It’s focus was on trying to make the case for moving towards a plant-based diet and moving as far away from animal products as possible.  It highlighted the work of two researchers: Dr. T. Colin Campbell and Dr. Caldwell Esselstyn.

It was interesting watching this movie after my recent foray into veganism ended so poorly.  Generally speaking, these movies never seem to make the impact on me that I anticipate.  I mean, I know of people who never went to McDonald’s again after seeing Supersize Me or who've never again eaten meat after seeing Food, Inc. 

Maybe I’ve seen too many (as evidenced above) and the message has dulled?  I don’t think that’s true at all.  I think it’s something else.  But what does it mean when you feel called in a certain direction, when you know what the right thing to do is for yourself – yet you don’t do it?

Is this what you call being a stubborn ass?

more on this topic tomorrow…

May 8th

Spring arrived just in time for Mother’s Day.  Thank you, mother of all mothers (mama earth that is)!  This is my fourth Mother’s Day since my mom passed and each year it gets a little easier.  Sunshine helps.

That first Mother’s Day was gloomy and pretty depressing as I recall.

I can only remember things that my blog tells me, so who knows where I was for the second year.

On the third one I was getting ready for my trip to the Grand Canyon and still feeling a little down – though Emmett was (and always is) a highlight.

But this year, the fourth since she died, was the best by far.  I met my sister and Emmett out for breakfast at Obama’s favorite joint.  We were lucky enough to be seated outside in the sunshine.  Unfortunately, because Evanston was once a dry town, there are still remnants of the Women’s Temperance Union hanging on and they don’t start serving bloody mary’s until noon.  What about the mothers? Don’t they deserve alcohol on this their day?

But they did have beignets.

(source)

As we ate and soaked in the sunshine there may or may not have been talk about how the 3 of us could become bandits.  I’d be the getaway driver.

Afterwards I was lucky enough to be invited to join my pal Sarah and her mama for a Historical House walking tour in Evanston.  Considering my great affection for snooping in folks’ homes (but not stealing! I’m just the driver, people) this was right up my alley.

This house was once a carriage house – as in ‘horse and buggy’ storage.  Later it became the home of a real ladies man and was featured in an article in Playboy entitled, ‘Swinging in the Suburbs’, And THAT is hilarious.  Oh, and also – those are cabanas there on the left. Right next to the kidney shaped pool.  Totally swinger-style. 

This one was my favorite.  I don’t know how to explain it, but it was gorgeous and open and airy.  and HUGE. And they had this beauty.  Still functioning and part of their daily use.

Part of what is so nice about the house tour is just the wandering around these lovely neighborhoods.  Especially on a day as gorgeous as yesterday was. 

I spent the rest of the day doing this:

  

I really have no plan when it comes to gardening, or for mother’s day for that matter – but it all turned out to be pretty lovely.

*special thanks to my sister, my nephew and the Price ladies for making this day as lovely as it was*