small things...

W.W.F.E.D?

Earlier in April I was out on a walk, trying to bank some steps onto my FitBit (do you have one?  can we be friends and race to our daily steps?) and thinking about some of the upcoming items on my list that are decidedly fitness/health related:

1. Try Paddleboarding

6. Hike 40 miles of trails in Illinois

9. Lose 25% of my body weight

11. & 12. kayaking/paddleboarding at sunset and sunrise

27. Complete a Mud Run

I was thinking about preparing specifically for #27, but also still trying to wrap my mind around #9 and how I want to accomplish this goal.  As a woman who has thought about her weight constantly since age 10, I’m not keen on the idea of another diet.  I’m not willing to deal with restriction in any way that removes pleasure from my life.  I am here on this planet to enjoy it.  HOWEVER, and this is a super-important-however-i –need-to-face….my body hasn’t been feeling good.  I can’t get around that fact.  My digestive system doesn’t feel right most days, my body is stiff and my joints are achy.  And my body is just plain heavier to move around.  It’s not like I only eat food that is amazing and delicious. I eat a lot of crap too.  Easy, convenient crap – does it even taste good?  I honestly don’t know.  I  could be making better choices.  It’s the getting myself to make those better choices that is going to be key.

Earlier that same morning, I was still in bed slowly waking up, trying to decide if I’d go for that walk.  I’d been dealing with muscle spasms in my calves that I wasn’t sure weren’t muscle tears (they weren’t!) when I asked myself, “What would the fit version of myself decide to do?”  And I answered, “Fit Erin would go for a walk.” So I did.

So far in the few weeks since I’ve been asking myself, “What Would Fit Erin Do?” (WWFED) It’s helped me order a delicious salad over a fatty sandwich, it’s helped me skip the bagel and Starbucks mocha in favor of the green smoothie I had waiting to be made at home, it’s pushed me to trust my body to go further.  It’s gotten me to bank my first 18K steps in a day. I love Fit Erin!

I also quickly realized that Fit Erin would know what her starting point is so she knows how to prepare for the journey ahead.  I’ve started by collecting data.

• I am using the Fit bit to track my steps with a goal of 10,000 steps a day.  I have a really sedentary job (I am 10 steps away from the bathroom, the copier and my file cabinet)  with an hour commute at either end of the day.  When I started out tracking steps I started by altering nothing to my day to see how many steps I naturally took each day.  roughly 3500.  I was shocked by how low the number was!  So I quickly learned that the only way to reach 10,000 was to go for a walk every morning before work.  I am now walking about 2.5-3 miles every morning.  My current goal is to have at least 5000-6000 steps complete before I leave for work.  My future goal is to work running back into the mix. Fit Erin is totally into it.
• I am  using Fit bit to track my calories.  I am using this just as data gathering for now.  I am not restricting what I eat in a prescribed way, if I go over the suggested amount,  I go over the suggested amount but I take a good look at what pushed me over the edge.  Was it worth it?  Only Fit Erin knows for sure.  My goal was to first figure out what kind of damage my current eating was doing to my calorie intake.  The most shocking: an 1150 calorie burrito from Chipotle.  This was a standard burrito for me.  I had no idea.  My second goal is to make adjustments to what I’m eating so that I meet the calorie limit more often than not.  The Fit bit tracking feature will keep track of carbs/fat/protein and vitamins and I’ll pay more attention to that later.  For now, I’m just finding my rhythm.  But I’m making changes.  You won’t find me going Vegan or Paleo or whatever is the popular diet these days.  But you will find me returning to more home cooked meals, more locally sourced foods, better food in general.
• Next on my list is building strength, flexibility and body confidence – not body image, actual confidence in my body’s abilities.  One of the worst consequences of neglecting my body/health for so long is the lack of confidence, and sometimes straight up fear, that I now have about my ability to do certain things I physically used to be able to.    Also, I totally have baby muscles now.  Fit Erin has guns, I’m pretty sure. 

So maybe you’re on a fitness journey too.  Maybe you’ve got some good ideas to share with me.  I’m looking for community with this one.

What would the Fit YOU do?  let me know!

xo

erin

Grand Canyon: Check

Dudes. I did it.

 
I promise a full recap of the trip tomorrow when I get back home.  But I couldn't wait to share the fact that I survived!

Day 2 – Phoenix to Sedona to the Grand Canyon

Good morning, peeps.  In case you forgot, I am HERE:

Source

The rest of yesterday was a bit of a sleepy blur.  My friend Rebecca B. picked me up in her cherry red Chevy impala and drove me across town for dinner with her husband Aaron and their cutie-pie daughter Lia.  (oh and also, Cosmo, the goosing-obsessed lab).  I don’t think I was too much fun last night b/c I was tired and slightly distracted all night long by the prospect of sleep.  But it was great to see them and their home and meet their daughter.

That bed I showed you was as comfy as it looks. 

In about an hour we head on charter buses for the 4 hour drive to the Grand Canyon.  We’ll make 2 stops on the way – First in Sedona (where I will try to find out if vortexes are for realz), then a stop at the Grand Canyon for our first peek at what we’ll find tomorrow (writing that made my stomach drop one centimeter!) then finally to our hotel!

Sandra (from our Chicago group) and I met for an early breakfast and then proceeded to hoard food for the rest of the day.  Here are the snacks I scored for the bus ride

Alright, I’m off for the day!  I don’t know for sure if I’ll have internet access or not at the next hotel.  Fingers crossed!

Love and snacks,

Erin

ps – I bought a hat for the hike.  And I wear sunglasses over my regular glasses.  Don’t fight my style, just go with it…

GOAL!!!!

(Source)

On Friday morning I sent out what I thought could be my final plea to my friends on Facebook letting them know that my deadline to meet my fundraising goal is April 29th.  I was hoping that over the next 4 weeks I’d be able to raise most of the money and that I’d cover the rest with my own donation.  I had about $1200 left to raise as of Friday morning. 

After sending the note I packed up a day bag and headed up to Michigan to spend the day with my sister and nephew in our beloved second home in Sawyer, MI.  It has been a really rough week for me health-wise and I’d just started to feel better that morning.  The three of us spent the day relaxing on the beach and then later back at the house on the back deck.  Emmett took me on a tour of the backyard, a place I’ve been many times, but four-year-olds do have a way of showing you the familiar in a whole new way. 

We had a few snacks and talked about life and changes and this whole journey we’ve been on since our parents died. 

We went to bed early and got up early the next day.  Emmett asked me a lot of questions about what’s been going on with my tummy (more on that later) and finally, FINALLY, I checked my emails to see if anyone had heeded my plea.

I’d like to keep private the amounts that people have donated or who donated what because the truth is that ALL of it has an impact.  Every last dollar.  Let’s just say that within 24 hours $1200 had been raised. 

I was stunned.

My heart swelled.

I felt an odd, and thankfully fleeting, pang of guilt.  It’s a funny thing feeling supported by people you care about.  It feels incredible, but there is a moment of  worry that you’re worth it or that what you’re doing is worth it.  I shook that off as fast as I could.

At my mom’s funeral I spoke about the importance of ‘showing up’ for the people you care about.  That’s what has happened for me through this process.  I got the privilege of knowing what it feels like when people ‘show up’. 

I’ve been struggling a little lately with my own desire to show up for all of you who donated and are still donating.  As I mentioned I’ve been dealing with some health issues and that along with my innate tendency to meander on these training hikes has left me feeling concerned about how this whole Grand Canyon hike will turn out.  Will my hike be worthy of your donations?  I really hope so.  I promise you that I will sweat and pant and look up every once and awhile to take it all in.  And there will be photos. lots and lots of photos.

It’s not too late to still show up.  I’ve met my goal, but it would be pretty amazing to surpass that goal. Should we go for $5000?

Thanks everybody. You are just the best.

love and heartswells,

Erin

Hike #6

We’re 2/3rds of the way to the fundraising goal! Now is the time to donate!!

This week I did the longest distance that I need to do pre-Grand Canyon.  I’m still trying to decide which hike I’ll do at the canyon, but the one I’m leaning towards is 6.5 miles, which is about the distance I went today.

It was wet and rainy and windy this morning, but I went out anyways because I am hardcore and dedicated to the mission. 

I did it for you, friends. I did it for you.  And this is what it looked like:

 

This is me about halfway through my hike and other then my face –  i was totally dry! Raingear works, dudes

Then last night I was treated to a surprise birthday dinner from some really lovely friends.  I was completely surprised and confused by it all as my birthday is not until next week.  Our table was decorated with candles and flowers, the wine was flowing and the food was good.  When they brought the cake it seemed like the entire restaurant joined in to sing happy birthday to me – it was all I could hear.  I’m pretty sure I forgot to make a wish, but I blew out all the candles in one try.  It was a really nice night.

Thank you, animal collective, so so much!

Love and chocolate cake,

Erin

Hike #5 – Lake Michigan will blow your mind

Hey you…yeah YOU…still thinking about donating?  Now’s your chance! Click the icon to your right and donate to your hearts content! ==> ==>

Spring sprang just a bit this weekend. You could hear the hallelujah chorus all over town.  It’ll get better soon.  Greener and flowerier, soon.  Before we know it, we will all be outside, breathing in deeply, smiling at everyone and reminding our winter skin what sunshine feels like.  I CANNOT wait.

But this weekend I had the task of mapping out and completing my training hike on my own.  I had to guesstimate a little bit, but was able to complete about a 5-mile hike along the lakefront leading from my front door.

I realize that some of you reading this blog may have never seen Lake Michigan, and may doubt it’s size and beauty.  I’m hoping to correct those assumptions today with a few snazzy photos.  For those of you very familiar, here is some love:

:: A common misconception that folks not-in-the-know have is that you can see across Lake Michigan, that it is somehow just an ordinary lake.  Not so.  It is LARGE, folks.  About the size of Costa Rica. 

:: I broke this ice with my foot.  Stomping my way around 5 miles.

:: Waiting patiently for their thrones to be reclaimed

:: Can you see it there in the distance?  The Chicago skyline

:: and sandy beaches lead the way out

:: little dude.

:: This is perhaps why I am so slow on my hikes.  Is anyone else noticing these little nuggets?  I think not.  I prefer my pace because I feel as though I have the chance to notice all the loveliness.

So the hike alone went well and I think I can continue with that plan through until the Grand Canyon.  I have a couple of friends who’ve volunteered to join me for a hike or two, so that will be fun.

Fundraising is kicking ass.  Or should I say, YOU ALL are kicking ass and helping me towards this fundraising goal.  THANK YOU and keep it up! :)

Love and beachfront property,

Erin

Training hike #3 - it’s okay to be last

Look over there!! ==> you can still donate==> it’s sooo easy ==> (and it makes you feel good too.

This week’s hike was at the Ryerson Conservation Center in Riverwoods, IL.  A much closer hike then the previous two so you might think that I would have gotten a good night sleep.  You’d be wrong.  Again I woke up at 3am.  Luckily this time I was able to sleep a bit off and on before I needed to get up for the hike.  And this time I decided to join my team despite my lack of sleep (and sore knee – did I mention my sore knee?)

Part of the thought process to convince me that a lack of good sleep was not the worst thing in the world was the idea that people who compete in the Ironman competitions probably have trouble sleeping before their races, right?  I mean they have to swim for 2.4 miles then bike for 112 miles and THEN run a marathon (26.2 miles).  That’ll make you a little nervous the night before.  So I figured if they could do all of that on less then 5 hours of sleep then I could WALK for 4.5 miles.

Yes. yes I just compared myself to an Ironman competitor. 

Whatever. it worked.

The drive into the woods to the parking lot was lovely.  My team was welcoming.  For some reason I felt a little extra shy even though I’d met everyone before – missing a week made me feel like I’d missed out on something and I felt a little self-conscious.  But it didn’t last.  I think people who do the Team in Training events do so partially because they like to be on a team.  Meaning they like to be with a group of people they can support and who will support them.  They are a nice bunch of folks.

Here’s a bit of what I saw on this hike:

:: It was snowing that morning, so everything had a fresh (and cold) look about it.  The Des Plaines River runs along the edge of the preserve and the trail edged up against it a time or two.

::There were a couple of these log cabins on the land.  Old summer homes of Ryerson and his buddies.  It was right here on the edge of the river and so lovely.

::look! rapids!

:: Okay now this was creepy.  A little too much like Children of the Corn for my liking.  But I’m sure it keeps the crows away.  And He Who Walks Behind the Rows…*shudder*

::This is what happens when you spend too much time taking pics and creeping out over scarecrows.  Look how far behind I was!  I was actually quite a bit further behind everyone before this point.  Trouble with my camelbak (had it all hooked up wrong), trouble with my knee and over all chattiness left me in the way back with our coach Kristen.  But we had fun – and I don’t mind being last.

11 more hikes until the Canyon!  I seriously can’t wait until there is a little green in these pictures.

love and crows,

Erin

Training Week #2 + insomnia = hiking alone

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The night before the second week of my grand canyon training I slept only 3 hours.  Insomnia is rare for me (if it’s rare, is it actually insomnia or just a bad night’s sleep??). Not being able to sleep leaves me feeling desperate.  I remember a few months ago after a couple of nights of little-to-zero sleep I seriously worried about the possibility that I’d forgotten how to sleep.   As if it was something I’d practiced all these years like dance steps, but now I didn’t know the next move.  Friday night felt a bit like that.

I got up when my alarm went off though I’d been awake for hours.  I got dressed, I ate something and I started to make my way out the door to go meet my teammates about an hour away for hike #2.  But I was exhausted and hesitant.  I worried that I’d be too tired to keep up with everyone.  or too tired to be friendly.  or too tired to walk all the way down to my car. 

So I went back to bed. 

And about an hour or two later (after actually falling asleep for a bit!) I tried again.  This time I headed over the Harms Woods to do the 3 miles hike myself.  There’s a nice big map just next to the parking lot with the mileage mapped out. It was a gorgeous morning despite the frigid air.  I’d dressed less warmly this week in hopes of avoiding the overheating incident of last week.  It worked!  Here’s a bit of what I saw:

The snow was deep and the trails an uneven mix of other people’s footprints and ski tracks.  I wished I’d had snowshoes to keep me from constantly slipping a little deeper with each step.

Fire hydrants in the woods  Ugly or handy?

I met this man on the path.  As we passed each other he held out his hand for a high-five…and I gave him one.  He called out, “We’re doing great!” a moment later.  People like other people who are out walking in the cold.  We are on the same team.  Team tough guys.

Through the magic of film I was able to convey how steep the climb over this bridge isn’t. It’s actually not so bad.  But I’m going for drama here, friends, I want to impress you with my training experiences.  are you not impressed?

One day soon these trees will be covered in green.  But for now they do well in pointing out how blue the sky is.

As for my trouble sleeping, Saturday night passed without my waking for several hours.  I am hopeful that next weekend I’ll be back with my hiking peeps.

Love and zzzzzzzz’s

Erin

a dinner invitation

Have you donated yet??  Click the link to the right…it’s so easy!  ==>>  ==>>

13 Saturday hikes to go and 25% to my fundraising goal!

One of the best parts, so far, about this endeavor is hearing from old friends of mine and from old friends of my parents. Some of the people I’ve reached out to have forwarded my email on to other people.  People who knew my parents, but perhaps not us as a family, or who hadn’t seen either of my parents in many years.  This week I received an email from one such person. 

A former fraternity brother of my dad’s wrote: 

After our wedding (1966), I went straight to the Navy rather than being drafted.  We were away for 4 years and reconnected with your Dad after returning to Chicago.  He and your Mom married while we were away so I called him and they invited us over for dinner.  I think they were living in an apartment in Rogers Park, close to the Lake.  When we arrived for dinner, your Dad said something about just finishing dinner and cleaning up the kitchen.  Then he looked at my wife and I and said, "We didn't invite you for dinner, did we?".  My wife and I looked at each other and politely said, "No". 

This story cracks me up.  Not just because my dad invited friends over w/o telling my mom then completely forgot the invitation himself. This story cracks me up because I KNOW that my dad would never have let someone get away with this if it had been the other way around.  In fact, I think he would have demanded food and beer while relentlessly teasing the forgetful inviter.

Had I known this story before it might have explained the recurring fear I experience just before I ring someone’s doorbell that they will have forgotten that I’d be coming over. 

**************************

Tomorrow is hike #2!  Pics and wrap-up later on this weekend.

love and dinner invitations,

Erin

Sashay, shantay

So this morning was the first official day of "training" for the big hike.  The Team-in-Training people provide a day-to-day schedule for getting all fit for the big hike and today was "Day 1". 

Day 1 = 15 minute walk. (I like this starting off slow business!)

So this morning I strapped on my shoes, tried to dress in the appropriate number of layers, remembered to wear my watch so I would be sure to turn around at the 7.5 minute mark so that I walk 15 minutes exactly, grabbed my keys, my phone (in case of emergency!) and my camera (?) well I thought maybe I'd see something worthy of a photo in 15 minutes. It turns out I did...more on that later.

This wasn't the first time I'd gone for a walk in the early morning in my neighborhood. In the warmer months I go all the time - heck some mornings I actually run.  But in the winter it is tough to get motivated. The only people I came across were people walking their dogs.  People in all form of dress walking their dogs.  Some were bundled head-to-toe in down jacket/hat/boot/mitten combos.  Some were clearly not warm enough in their Evanston-Hockey jackets and no hats.  One lady was clearly wearing her pink bathrobe and pjs under her jacket. bravo, sleepy lady.

Just after my 7.5 minute turnaround I peeked up ahead of me to scan the nieghborhood. 

(Let me point out that when it is this cold people tend to keep their faces turned as far towards their chest as possible to ward off the frigid air.  Not the best policy for walking alone in the early am, I know. Perhaps I need a face mask) 

Up ahead I saw this small person coming towards me.  I couldn't make out whether it was a man, woman or child, but whoever it was they were walking fast!  As I got closer I realized it was an elderly woman, but what was most noticeable was the walk..or rather the swagger this lady had going on.  She held her arm out to the side -  just above her hip, arm loose, but extended.  Her left arm was tucked in above her purse, her hand firmly placed on the strap just at her breast.  With each step her hips hit a silent beat to the left and then to the right.  And her loose extended arm snapped at the wrist in time with her hips.  eyes fixed up ahead on wherever she was headed.  She belonged on a runway with that walk.  Or in an old movie where they'd have her walk just like that past a group of men who'd crane their necks to watch her pass, eyes bugged out, jaws to the floor...someone would utter "humina, humina"

It was awesome and envy worthy.  I could nearly hear the beat she sashayed to.

Boom-boompa-boom-boompa-boom-boompa-boom